Monday, March 9, 2015

Chappie Exploratory Fiction Vol. 1

Chappie looked at the sun.
"Is this warm feeling on my skin... love?" asked Chappie, whose name was actually CHAPPiE.
"No, Chappie," smiled Kim. "Love is like warmth... in your heart."
She touched where his heart would be if he were not a robot. Chappie cried a single tear, which was some sort of robot lube?

Chappie wondered if IHOP was open, but he couldn't remember their phone number.
"Silly Chappie," smiled Kim. "IHOP is always open."
"Just like... my heart?" asked Chappie.

Chappie remembered the 1-800 number for IHOP! "But for what?" he wondered out loud.
"Such is the futility of life, Chappie," smiled Kim.
"Kim," said Chappie. "What is the scientific definition of life?"
Kim pointed to where Chappie's heart would be if he were not a robot. "I think the real question is 'what is the real definition... of love.'" Chappie pretended to smile but he thought that what Kim said sucked pretty bad.

"SPACE IS EXPLODING!!!" shouted Chappie.
Was it a dream?
No!! Chappie was watching a movie.
Perhaps... it was his own.

Chappie thought his mouth was on fire, but he was just eating a Warhead.

"If you stick a Warhead in a glass of water for awhile before you eat it, it makes you a real wuss, Chappie," said the bad guy. His name was probably Paul. He was mean as heck and had a weird eye.
"Paul (?), have you ever thought about how the human heart is a lot like a Warhead?" said Chappie.

Chappie couldn't save Kim. Now that he thought about it, he wasn't really sure who she was.
"I'm not human. I'm a monster," Chappie wept.
"Don't you see, Chappie?" snarled Paul or Pam maybe. "That makes you even more human."
"I don't get it," said Chappie.